My Friend Isabelle
Eliza Woloson
Bryan Gough, illustrator
Woodbine House, 2003
Hardcover $14.95
1-890627-50-X

When Eliza Woloson talks, we need to listen.

Woloson, a Boulder, Colorado mother, is talking about differences. And she wants all of us to talk about them, too. To start the conversation, she's written a book, My Friend Isabelle. This charming picture book lovingly shows the tender friendship between her daughter, Isabelle, and her friend, Charlie. Like most friends, they enjoy each other's company. On their weekly play date they eat snacks, go to the park, and play together. They are very much alike.

Though the same age, they are also different - one is fast, the other slow, one is tall, the other short, and one happens to have Down syndrome.

Woloson never tells the reader that Isabelle has Down syndrome. Parents learn this fact from the back cover. She gracefully shows that everyone is different and that differences are not impediments to forming friendships. Woloson's message is that differences are what make friendships interesting.

And it's what she wants to talk about. "We need ways to talk to all of our kids about differences," she said. "Parents don't know how to talk to their kids about people who have special needs."

Woloson encourages parents and educators to use her book to facilitate discussions about differences. On the inside of the back cover, she writes a note to parents, "Through their friendship, Charlie and Isabelle are doing their small part in making the world a more tolerant place."

Kids are naturally curious about differences, especially the ones they can see. Parents need to be open to their children's curiosity so they can answer their questions, "Why does he look like that?" or "Why does she talk funny?" Parents can simply answer without judgment by saying things such as, "He was born that way," "We all have things that are hard for us, it's hard for her to talk, walk, whatever. Can you think of something that's hard for you?"

Woloson also want to see parents who do have kids with special needs learn how to talk about their differences with other children and adults. "We need to know what we want to say, what we want people to know about us and our children." We inadvertently teach prejudice when we don't talk about our differences or ignore the person in a wheelchair next to us or teach pity for the poor crippled kid. The hardest ones to talk about are the kids who look normal but have behavioral and social issues. We need to talk about those kinds of differences, too.

Gough's gentle illustrations complement Woloson's sparse text. Soft sweeps of color are given shape with pencil outlines giving both children a realistic whimsy. Though they look very simple, there is movement and expression.

From Charlie's perspective, and hopefully readers, Isabelle is not defined by Down syndrome - it is just part of who she is, along with being a good friend to Charlie. Let's talk about making that an attitude we all can all share.

Nearly every classroom in America has a child with some kinds of special need or learning disability. If young children read books like these in preschool and kindergarten, perhaps the world would be, as Charlie says, "more fun with friends like Isabelle."

Who do you want to talk to?

Copyright © 2004 Anna Stewart. All rights reserved worldwide.