During my lifetime, we Americans have been involved in seven different wars (that I know of). I now have 4 grandchildren all under age 4. So I awoke the other day wondering: How can my grandchildren be raised to be peacemakers?

Our police force used to be called "peace officers." The U.N. soldiers are referred to as "peace keepers." We read in the New Testament that peacemakers are blessed and are referred to as "sons of God." Practically anyone who has directly experienced war usually comes out of the experience (if they survive) as an advocate for peace. Let's be direct...war kills people. That is the primary purpose of war...killing people. The world seems to have been always divided between two groups: war lovers and peace lovers. How can we raise our children to become the latter?

Mattie J. T. Stepanik, author of "Heart Songs" was a child who never became old enough to participate in war. He spent most of his young life confined to a wheelchair and in a body ill with a rare form of Muscular Dystrophy. He died last year after having a powerful impact on presidents, celebrities and any one who read his books. His last book was titled: "Reflections of a Peacemaker: A Portrait Through Heartsongs." He referred to himself as a peacemaker. Indeed, he was!

In her award-winning book, "Looking for God in All the Wrong Places," Marie D. Jones asks the question, "...how is it possible that someone so small and needy and adorable [as her 21-month old son, Max] could grow up one day to go off and kill other human beings, all in the name of 'country' or 'patriotism' or, worst of all, 'God?'"

Jones goes on to write: "I realize there are people who want to make war and commit acts of violence for monetary gain or nationalistic pride or religious fanaticism or just plain power. But I believe that peace is always a better choice than war." How can we raise our children to honor those who choose to fight for peace in the same way we honor those who go off to make war? Below are some suggestions for raising peacemakers.

Teach your children to respect themselves and to respect others. This is best accomplished by parents who exemplify self-respect and respect for others regardless of their ethnic heritage, skin color, religious or political beliefs. The "golden rule" applies here: behave toward others as you want them to behave toward you...whether they do so or not!

Point out to your children the benefits of living peacefully. Benefits we usually take for granted. Teach them to live peacefully, without fear, inside themselves. Accentuate the positive aspects of peaceful living in harmony with their environment and all living beings within it.

Let them know that when bad things happen, they are immediately over. They always have a choice about how to respond to any negative event. Demonstrate peaceful alternatives to violence or killing as ways of responding to painful or frightening events.

Reinforce natural curiosity and understanding. Encourage children to look at all sides of a situation prior to taking deliberate action.

Instill in your children the notion that the world is a positive place...naturally, and that it is usually safe. If it were not so, the human race would have died out long ago.

Finally, teach children the critical skill of forgiveness. Distinguish between forgiveness for hurt and loss from condoning it. Forgiveness is letting go of one's own anger and resentment. Anger over events one cannot control only hurts the angry one.

If our children learn to make choices from the heart, if they learn to function from a position that all life is precious, they will certainly grow up to be "sons of God," lovers of peace and genuine peacemakers in all their relationships.